Winning, Losing, or Learning?

Monday, April 08, 2024


Have you ever heard the saying, "Sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose?"

Well, what if you could change that saying to, "Sometimes you win, and sometimes you learn!"

Learning is not losing. In fact, learning is part of winning. Just like failure is part of success. 

So what’s the biggest difference between winners and losers?

Perspective. It's how you choose to see it, and the cool thing about that is you get to choose! Anytime you get to choose, that means you’re in control of what you think, how you feel, and where you will go, because of, or in spite of, the circumstances (or people) around you.

Look, we all know not everything in life is good, but good can come from even the worst of situations.

Once again, the Rectangle, the Shape of change and growth, comes to mind. Take a step back, pause, and reflect. Consider your options for what's next. It can be hard to tell your Box to take a break from being so logical, or your Triangle from being in charge, or your Circle to "think objective" vs. "feel emotion," or your Squiggle to pause and evaluate before instantly reacting with the next great idea!

But, if you can have the discipline to pause and get into your Rectangle state of openness, considering lessons learned and what to do as a result, then you have the greatest advantage of all!

Being in a learned state of Rectangle openness has saved me so many times. Try it. You can always say what you believe, think, or feel tomorrow. But if you say it in the moment, without the time to process, reflect, and consider what it is you want or will say, it is hard to take it back. While my fundamental beliefs remain true, it is the discipline to embrace the Rectangle that has helped me the most when it comes to communicating effectively. And, I believe, it can help you, too.

Just remember: 

An open mind is not an empty mind. 

An open mind just means you care enough to listen and understand, regardless of your pre-conceived thoughts, feelings, or ideas. And regardless of what you believe, listening to understand is the ultimate advantage when it comes to communicating effectively. Because now you know how to connect.


If you want to learn more about PsychoGeometrics, including our online DIY modules, upcoming certification online classesour new book, or how we can customize a team-building workshop for your group, feel free to reach out to me directly. Our team truly loves helping people leverage their Shapes for effective and influential communication!


Susan Hite, CEO, PsychoGeometrics, The Science of Behavior - The Art of Communication