Whether it's your life partner, work partner, or "partner in crime" (friend, family member, or co-worker), we all have different ways of expressing love, care, or concern.

But unless it's the way you show love, care, or concern, we sometimes misunderstand and see a different response, behavior, action, or interaction as anything but love. Instead we might perceive someone's Shape communication style as:

- indifferent, apathetic

- over-confident, arrogant

- self-centered, self-absorbed

- unrealistic, not helpful

- over-the-top, "just fluff"

Have you ever been misunderstood?

Have you ever misperceived others?

Now that you are aware, and as long as you have the desire, all you need now is the power to Shape Flex. Below is part of what we teach in our Shapes for Effective Communication Course. Understanding "What" and "How" to identify someone's Shape.

Shape Flexing is the skill set of adding a specific Shape behavior, or combination of Shape behaviors, to strengthen your communication effectiveness.

Here are the steps for Shape Flexing:

1. Enable your senses - Identify their Shape through verbal or non-verbal communication. "What do you see?" "What do you hear?" The answers serve as clues and help us make assumptions.

2. Process - Clarify your assumptions through open-ended questions or statements. "Tell me more."

3. Connect the dots - Listen to understand. "What are they looking for?" "What do they need?" "What is their situation?"

4. Flex - Modify your communication style based on what they reveal about themselves and their situation.

Learn more about Shape Flexing here.